When life gets busy, one of the first things to go in a relationship is sex. Couples are too tired, too full, too stressed, too distracted. Simply put: not in the mood.
We get it — there are a million and one legitimate reasons not to have sex tonight, tomorrow or the day after that. But there are plenty of couples out there who are doing the deed five, six, seven or more times a week. We recently asked married HuffPost readers who have sex every night (barring things like sickness, business trips or other extenuating circumstances, of course) how it has improved their lives and relationships. Below are 13 good reasons to get it on with your spouse on a near daily basis.
1. It provides some much-needed couple time.
“My husband and I have sex every night because it’s a moment in the day that is just about the two of us. We are parents to a toddler, so when we lay him down for bed each night, we can then spend the rest of the night expressing how we feel about each other physically. Having sex allows us to be passionate, to show affection and we enjoy pleasing each other.” – Christie M. of Arkansas; married 3 years
2. It leads to more PDA outside of the bedroom.
“We’re very physically expressive with one another, even when we’re not having sex. We hold hands a lot, he slaps my butt when I’m working in the kitchen, I nuzzle his neck when he’s working on research papers at the desk.” – Jesse N. of Ontario, Canada; married less than one year
3. It can be a workout if you do it right.
“When you have four kids and no time, sex is the best exercise.” – Tera M. of Oklahoma, married less than one year
4. It gets you out of your head for a little while.
“Sex for me, and now for my husband since we’ve gotten together, is a complete escape from reality. We are both very much into role-playing and it’s such a wonderful feeling to not have to be me for a while, to completely shut off from our crappy day-to-day existence and strictly be about ourselves and our enjoyment.” – Sara C., of Panama City, Florida; married one year
5. It builds trust.
“New positions and sexual frontiers take a lot of trust in your partner to not screw it up, and that kind of trust is best earned after several years of personal and joint bodily exploration.” – Kristena M. of Richmond, Virginia; married 10 years
6. It’s a way to connect without speaking.
“Sex is a vital part of marriage. It brings couples together in a way that other things don’t. What I mean is that it promotes togetherness, snuggling and cuddling, and it’s a way to connect without words.” – Teresa F. of Nashville, Michigan; married 37 years
7. You might end up arguing less.
“We know when something is off with each other. And most importantly, we don’t fight, argue or bicker! We sit down and talk things out. Staying connected like that helps us communicate better outside of the bedroom.” – Libby S. of Indianapolis, Indiana; married 2 years
8. It forces you to get creative.
“Being intimate so often, and sharing what each person needs and wants allows the freedom of creativity. There is no position or situation either of us has ever denied the other. This makes us each feel more and more comfortable to share [fantasies] or point out a hot girl or guy, and say what we’d like to do with them in bed.” – Arlene B. of Monterey, California; engaged for 3 years
9. It’s easier to schedule than a formal date night.
“I think it’s the easiest way to have some romance since we really don’t do date nights or vacations alone. Plus, I know my husband enjoys it.” – Emily D. of Pleasanton, California; married 12 years
10. One word: Orgasms.
“The benefit for me is that it feels simply amazing. I also love to see how my husband gets lost in the moment. Being able to see that level of complete satisfaction on his face is so satisfying to me.” – Stacia L. of Texas; married 11 years
11. It improves self-esteem.
“It has brought a new level of happiness for me personally, and has helped my self-esteem knowing that after two kids, my husband still thinks I’m sexy.” – Karri H. of Alaska, married 6 years
12. It’s a guaranteed mood booster.
“He sings in the shower after morning sex, nearly every time. This is all the proof I need that sex is a mood enhancer for him. And I’d like to think that good mood carries over into other parts of his day. I love knowing that I’m the reason he’s smiling at work.” – Jesse N. of Ontario, Canada; married less than one year
13. If you use it, you won’t lose it.
“If sex is such a large part of your routine and a big priority, it never becomes low priority or gets weird or awkward. And you won’t have to worry about how to resume or reconnect. Just don’t ever stop doing it!” – Lara G. of Austin, Texas; married 24 years
Some responses have been edited and condensed.
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